What do you hope to change in 2019? If your New Year's resolutions have already gotten off track, don't feel bad. Various studies estimate that 80 to 90 percent of resolutions fail. We can get our resolutions back on track — we can build motivation and increase our chances for success by continually reminding ourselves why change is important to us. The same is true with professional or organizational goals.
In my career, I've been what some might call a “change agent,” working as an employee or serving as a consultant to organizations that say they want to change. Effecting change is often easier said than done, as some experts suggest that about 70% of large-scale change initiatives fail to meet expectations in various workplaces (although some question that estimate). Similar to our personal resolutions, these organizations often spend too much time talking about what needs to change, instead of focusing more on why.
One of the most useful frameworks I've found — both for leadership and for personal change — comes from a practice called motivational interviewing.
An individual saying, “I want to lose weight” or a business leader proclaiming, “We need to all make better use of our new software system” doesn't mean change will necessarily follow quickly or easily. Why? Because…
…organizations are complicated, and so are individuals.
Having enough desire to say “I need to change” or “I want to change” is just the starting point. We have to keep reminding ourselves why change is important in order to continually talk ourselves into taking action and sustaining change.
Change is an ongoing process, not a one-time event.
Far too often, people or organizations end up, essentially, talking themselves out of change. We have reasons to change, but we also have reasons to maintain the status quo. We're “on the fence” or “stuck,” which means positive and self-motivated changes often don't hold. Someone want to eat better, but a daily habit of ice cream after dinner sure seems to help after a stressful day.
What Is Motivational Interviewing?
A few years back, I was introduced to a social worker turned entrepreneur at the annual Lean Startup Week event. She asked about my work and I ended up talking about how difficult it is to sustain change in organizations, even when most everybody agrees the changes are positive. She told me about a methodology called “Motivational Interviewing,” which is described by its creators as:
“a collaborative conversation for strengthening a person's own motivation and commitment to change”
One of the core lessons of Motivational Interviewing is that it's normal and quite natural for people to be stuck in a state of ambivalence, even when faced with the idea of a positive change that we initiate (as opposed to being forced on us). We should expect ambivalence and shouldn't beat ourselves up over it. We have some desire for change, but we also have reasons not to change. Again, this is normal, but we can work through it.
I've since written more about how five motivational interviewing questions can replace the typical “here's what we're doing now” approach in coaching conversations.
Change Talk vs. Sustain Talk
When we express (or, more often, think) positive thoughts, therapists would call “change talk.” We also undercut our motivation for change by being negative or expressing (or thinking about) reasons not to change, referred to as “sustain talk.”
The practice of Motivational Interviewing shows us that the greatest predictor of taking action and sustaining that change is when change talk outweighs sustain talk.
While this approach comes from the realm of counseling, the method is very useful in strengthening one's motivation in the workplace or in our personal lives.
When we talk about change positively in terms of our desires, ability, reasons, or needs, that's “change talk.” These include statements like, “I'm going to exercise more,” “I can make time to exercise every morning,” “If I get in better shape, I'll have a longer, more active life,” or “I need to lose weight to improve my health.”
When I feel stuck, one lesson I've adopted from Motivational Interviewing is to actually write out as many change talk statements as I can. That's something that can be posted on my bathroom mirror, desk, or wherever I'm likely to be reminded of it. Some suggest saying the reasons out loud is even more powerful.
Another thing that's helpful is to be more mindful of sustain talk in your words or your inner monologue. Again, don't blame yourself when it happens, but recognize it and try to think (or better yet speak) some change talk.
Don't just remind yourself what you're trying to change — remind yourself of the reasons why.
How I Used Motivational Interviewing While Writing My Book
When I was in the process of writing my latest book, Measures of Success: React Less, Lead Better, Improve More, I was quite often stuck in that state of ambivalence. Of course, the book was something I wanted to write.
I was expressing both “change talk” and “sustain talk” at various times, a classic sign of ambivalence.
Whenever I recognized sustain talk (being too busy, worrying if anybody would actually buy it), I tried replacing with change talk. Instead of just focusing on “I want to write a book,” I kept the written why statements in front of me, such as “Finishing this book will be an important contributor to my own success over the next few years.” Below is a similar process that my book coach, Cathy Fyock, had suggested. Looking at this made me think more about the “why” than the “what” of writing.
Two Questions to Get Unstuck
If you're struggling to come up with change talk statements, there are two questions that you can ask yourself from the Motivational Interviewing playbook.
First, ask, “How motivated are you to make this change?” on a scale of 1 to 10, with 1 being not at all motivated and 10 being completely motivated. Let's say you answered “5.” The important follow-up question is, “Why did you say 5 instead of 1?” Your answer to this question draws out desires, reasons, and needs. Another question you can ask is, “How confident are you in making this change?” with the same 1 to 10 scale and the same follow up question.
These methods, applied to your own New Year's resolutions or other professional goals, will help turn a desire or a wish into commitment, action, and sustainment. The way we've typically done resolutions in the past doesn't work; thankfully, Motivational Interviewing shows us a better way.
I explored this idea further in a post about why decisions take longer than we think they should — and why pushing harder usually backfires.
If you'd like to learn more about Motivational Interviewing, I've compiled a page with a number of links and resources. The co-authors of Motivational Interviewing for Leadership joined me on the podcast to discuss how MI applies to organizational change.
Cheryl Jekiel and I discussed this on the podcast — how motivational interviewing connects to building independent teams and why change happens one person at a time.
I had some additional thoughts while working out this morning. In the past, I would listen to music or podcasts while in the gym. I’ve found that it works better for me to use an app, Aaptiv, that has specially programmed routines for the elliptical machine. These workouts include appropriate music and, better yet, some energetic coaches that you hear.
The coaches will often say things like, “Try to remember why you got into the gym today” or other things that make you think about your personal “why?”
I find that their comments prompt “change talk” in my head. This strengthens my commitment to finishing the workout and coming back again. The trainers can’t “motivate me,” but they can help me discover and strengthen my own motivation. I mean, I have at least *some* motivation or I wouldn’t have downloaded the app and I wouldn’t be on the elliptical.
I notice the trainers don’t talk about barriers. Doing so would trigger “sustain talk,” such as “I find it hard to work out when I travel.”
Examples of change talk would include: I need to work out, I want to exercise more, I’m going to start working out five days a week, I’m going to work out more while on the road because that’s important to maintaining weight loss and fitness. Change talk might get into reasons like “I am going to exercise harder because I want to avoid Type 2 diabetes” or “I need to work out more so my suit pants fit properly.” We have our own motivations that are unique to us and our situation.
The more change talk outweighs the sustain talk, the more likely we are to move forward with change.
I think focusing on the why is the best thing you can do. It makes you dig deeper into the changes that you are thinking about. By making people or yourself focus on the change, it motivates them more when they think of what could come from change. It allows you to experience what the change will be like for a moment and make you want to continue with whatever change you want to make. You almost get a look into the future and your motivations all of the sudden become 10 times stronger because you develop a passion towards what you want to do.